Learn From The Gardener How To Care For Your Relationship And Make It Healthy Like a Flourishing Garden...
The basic truth is that building and caring for a
relationship is like cultivating and maintaining a garden. Anyone who has ever
attempted to grow a plant in a pot or in the ground knows the basic steps
needed to enable a plant to survive and thrive. You don’t just plant for the sake
of planting or because others are planting. First, you must have a targeted aim
and passion for the crops you’ve planted in your garden. For you to achieve this
targeted aim you must provide it with fertilized soil, water, sunshine, pruning
and love as you witness your plant mature and bloom.
The same basic method adapted to relationships can produce a
healthy and blossoming love year after year. But the biggest problem in a lot
of our relationship is that you get so comfortable and you just start taking it
for granted, and you want your partner to stick around no matter what. You can’t
expect your difficult relationship to improve unless you put in the work. And remember
nobody is going to stay in a relationship where they are not happy – keep that
in mind.
Seasoned gardeners know that plants mature with time and go
through seasonal stages in their life cycle. They accept that plants will have
their dormant stages and trust that spring will awaken them and restore their
vitality. In relationships many couples expect their mate to sustain a
constant, enthusiastic and excited emotional responsiveness. This unrealistic
expectation does not allow for the normal flow of closeness and distance to
fluctuate and may resort at times to concluding that their relationship has
been irrevocably negatively altered.
Gardeners know that happy plants respond to ongoing, tender
care. Leaving a plant unattended for long periods of time will cause the plant
to wilt. Some spouses are not sufficiently aware that when they become
excessively involved with their work and responsibilities and appear to take
the mate for granted, their spouse is left feeling abandoned, rejected and
lost. Doubts about oneself and the relationship may plague the partner as
he/she is left to his/her fears and doubts.
Plant lovers know that they need to pay regular attention to
their garden to assure it is in a healthy state. But very few partners schedule
a periodic discussion about their relationship and asses the option for
improvement of their love bond.
Those who carefully attend to their plants accept that
plants exhibit dead leaves and require periodic pruning. This process does not
hurt the plant; in fact, it stimulates healthy new growth to sprout and then
bloom. In relationships, discussing with each other habits, conduct, or manners
that are ineffectual can stimulate abandoning ways that are distressing to the
partner and create greater accommodations and closeness between the mates.
As important as it is to communicate your own needs, hopes
and expectations in your relationship it’s equally crucial to hear your partner
out too. Therefore, in relating how we take care and maintain our relationship
to how the gardener would take care of his garden. We must learn from the
gardener and accept that relationships, like nature, go through phases of
wilting and blooming. Abstain from deducing that your partner is flawed. Ask about
how you can help him/her bloom again and accommodate your beloved. Provide attention,
love, care and affirmation to your beloved to help him/her and your
relationship to blossom…
The information contained on this
blog is written based on my own empirical understanding and is true for me at
the time they were written. However, as I continue to grow in knowledge and
understanding, what I perceived as the truth will definitely change, as a
result of this – the information contained on this blog may not reflect my
current outlook. Therefore, I am not liable for any special, direct, indirect,
consequential, or incidental damages or any damages whatsoever, arising out of
or in connection with the contents of this blog.
Alex Oduanam
1 comment
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